So, let me just say that there has been A LOT of dirty talk coming out of my mouth over the past few days, and it wasn’t the fun kind. Well, not all of it, anyway.
Or even most of it.
Truth is, although I’ve been developing online for years, for some reason, the past year or so, it seems like hackers and server errors have taken more of my time than the actual work I do.
In this latest case, a blunt force mass attack put my personal dedicated server to unavailable status for two days, took down a site of mine (and I had to restore and rebuild), and put me 4-5 days behind schedule.
And damnit! That cuts into my kink time!
But that’s not fun to talk about. I’m just telling you because I promised a special goody for you, and I want you to know it’s coming. I haven’t forgotten.
But the dirty talk… the good kind. Well, that’s another story.
Just today, I was talking up a storm with my boy. It was a welcome start to a trying day. We played a bit with bonding, cuckolding and nurturing themes. And after, I was reminded of the chapter in “In Through the Out Door,” where I discuss various kinds of dirty talk
I have head over and over from men and women alike that they have a hard time figuring out what to say.
And they feel kind of silly saying the things that come to mind.
And I get that. I used to be exactly that way.
And, then I got over it.
As you’ve probably figured, it wasn’t that easy. And it was, in some ways. You see, I read a lot about dirty talk, and I though about dirty talk that I had loved during different encounters, and I realized something very simple:
It all sounds stupid, when you say it (or think it) outside of playtime.
ALL. OF. IT.
And during playtime, I can practically sing “Mary Had A Little Lamb,” and it will be hot. Because I am connecting with my boy (or girl), and the CONNECTION is what is important.
So, I’ve found that I just talk. Sort of a stream of consciousness.
When I first started, I had a theme for the evening that I began with, and riffed from there.
Now, I just talk.
And you know what? It works. And it’s hot. Not just for my partner, but for me. Expressing what is in my heart and my head during pleasure adds a level of connection above and beyond the physical.
In “In Through the Out Door” I discuss different types of dirty talk and how to get started dirty talking during backside playing. But I’ve really just shared the secret with you.
Try it. Say things you mean. Do it during hot sexy fun times.
I hope your Monday is going well, and I’m going to get back to work on that special surprise…